I am so tired this morning. I had a surprise visitor knocking on my door at quarter past twelve, after I had already been lying in my bed for over an hour. While I love the friend who came to visit me, I do NOT love the time he chose. Now I am f*cked for work this morning. I was laying in bed after he left too awake to go back to sleep. Not to mention he scared the SHIT out of me.... I live alone and when someone knocks on your door and gets you out of bed at Midnight it is scary. Well at least it was for me last night! I called Autumn and woke her up because I was scared! LOL OK I need to get over this. It's done.
I have been thinking of ways to embrace the desire to lose the weight. Then it occurred to me as I was looking at some thin, slender girl and being mad at her for her that there is no reason to get mad at her. She obviously made a decision. You can't have it all. You can't be thin and eat what you want. That thin girl probably never eats half the crap I do. She's probably miserable because she never gets to taste anything good. Well, I would rather that kind of miserable then being miserable because you're fat and feel disgusting and unhealthy. So then I realized I have to make a decision. Either way you're gonna be miserable, which way do I want to be miserable? Either because I am fat or because eating now sucks because all the food tastes like cardboard and garbage. I am trying to stick to my decision to be miserable for the latter cause.
I did NOT do a good job of that this weekend. I blame that on hormones and craving to eat chips and dip all weekend. It was FAB but I know it was so bad.
On Saturday I signed up to be a Mona Vie distributor. I have not ordered the juice yet but as soon as I can afford to I will. If anyone is interested in learning about it let me know. :)