Hello,
I have been pretty busy getting adjusted to the new job so I haven't been online much. But I love my job! It is great to have essentially the same schedule as most of the people in my life. I sleep at night, am awake during the day with the rest of the world, and I do a LOT of walking at work, actually more than when I worked on 6. Well, not always but often I walk back and forth from Main, to Mott, to Med Inn, Cancer Center and back. But it is good exercise. :) My co-workers are very nice and have been very welcoming to me. We all get along well. I really couldn't ask for much more.
Well, I have had some not so nice discoveries, too. Be warned, if you're weird about hearing/reading about period stuff, read no further.
I haven't had a period since September 3. After multiple negative pregnancy tests I went to the doctor and had some blood work done. My thyroid is OK, as is my glucose, but apparently my follicle stimulating hormone and luteinizing hormone are off, which from what I am told is indicative of
Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome. Needless to say I am sad, scared, and pissed the hell off.
So,
this is the thanks I get for doing it all right. I go to high school, graduate, go straight to college, get a good education and dependable, respectable career, graduate, get married, buy a house, set up a 401K, have 2 decent cars in the driveway for us, and *BAM*. You're fucking infertile. Well, maybe not. So OK, *BAM*, best case scenario you'll need to be on meds to stimulate ovulation to get pregnant, or you'll have to learn how to shit money so you can pay for in vitro fertilization. BULLSHIT. Or I will have to pay ass loads of money so I can adopt someone else's kid. While I am over here worrying about the THOUSANDS of dollars I may have to come up with in order to be a Mommy, let me take this opportunity to say that it is free to get knocked up in an alley in Detroit while smoking crack. Those kinds of people can get pregnant, but I may not be able to. Cue in Alanis Morrissette's "Isn't it Ironic". It PISSES ME OFF that people who have no business getting pregnant seem to make a hobby of it while I would be a good Mom and I may not even be able to.
On the bright side, this explains the unexplainable weight gain. I hope it get be corrected, along with my bum ovaries.
I feel defective. I am made a woman so I can reproduce. Is there a consollation prize for not being able to use these ovaries for their obvious intent? Will someone make them into bronzed matching paper weights for me? It is all just very unfair and painful.
Granted, I may be *slightly* over reacting because I haven't gotten the official diagnosis from the doctor. That comes Tuesday. But I am a nurse, and I see the evidence right in front of my face. If I don't get diagnosed with it then I will be COMPLETELY surprised, and elated.
Updates will be up when I find them out and can stomach typing them.
